This is a deep one. How is it that human beings can fail to love themselves and those who are nearest and dearest? Where does this come from and what can you do about it? The answers to this question could form the subject of another book or several other books. What we can say for now is that confident people tend to be less fearful of others and more generous in their dealings with them. They also tend to be easier on themselves.
 

One school of thought suggests that we screw up our natural capacity for being loving by pretending to be what we are not. Then, when the way we are actually being fails to match up to the image we are trying to project we become frustrated and angry with others and ourselves. Not only is this stupid and self-defeating, it also prevents our growth into the person we so want to become. The antidote is to become more authentic about how we are today and taking action to allow our authentic confidence to grow.