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June 2006 Newsletter: Capturing the
energy from adversity
This
Confidence newsletter is sent each month to subscribers of
www.yourmostconfidentself.com from Kate Burton and Brinley Platts,
the authors of "Building
Confidence for Dummies" and creators of the Your Most Confident Self
website.
Capturing the energy from
adversity
This month's theme is
inspired by a new workshop we’ve been running for business groups, Confidence in
Adversity, in which delegates take the opportunity to face up to their biggest
challenges at work. You’ll remember that our definition of confidence is your
ability to take effective and appropriate action regardless of how you feel
inside; well this workshop teaches you how to use the trepidation you may be
feeling to spur you into powerful action.
Often the toughest times yield the best results: those times where you really
have no choice but to step up and face difficulties and hardships enable you to
grow and to learn, raising your game as you do so, becoming a new, stronger,
more authentic version of yourself in the process.
You may be surprised to learn that any kind of opposition can be an ally for
your confidence by taking you to your learning edge and leading you to your most
energetic and resourceful states when you need them. But we have many great
lessons throughout history of heroic leaders who came into their own through
adversity, often in times of conflict. Their ‘moment of truth’ when they heard
and responded to the call to action proved a turning point for their lives and
those of their followers. And this thinking is embedded in a philosophy that
dominated western thought for over 1500 years.
If you were to travel back in time to Athens in 300 BC, you would encounter the
birth of stoicism, a school of philosophy and spirituality founded by Zeno. It
deals with personal happiness and fulfilment, contending that your best means to
them is through living in harmony with the intentions of the gods, or fates.
According to Zeno, our job is to do whatever we think is best, with all our will,
but ultimately we can never control the fates so we accept the results they deal
us. This is a fantastic philosophy for confidence and courage and for leading
the every day heroic life in ways we discuss in
Building Confidence for Dummies.
Stoicism became the most important philosophy in Rome, and was at the heart of
the Roman Empire. The Apostle Paul included references to Stoic philosophers in
the Bible. It heavily influenced the Victorian world-view and came to represent
all that was best in the British Empire.
Partly in reaction to the Victorians we almost lost sight of this very practical
and personal stoic philosophy, but in the 1950s and 60s it was reintroduced to
the west in modern therapies and is at the heart of a lot of the healing and
self-help schools of the later 20th century. It is embodied in the famous
serenity prayer of Alcoholics Anonymous: “God grant me the serenity to accept
the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to
know the difference.”
A lot of what you will read in Building Confidence for Dummies owes a debt to
stoicism, as do the worlds of strategic planning, team building, and much
business theory. So, we recommend you bring the practical heart of stoicism into
your own life through three simple rules:
1. Be significant! Impact the world as powerfully as you can by changing the
things that you feel need to be changed (starting with aspects of yourself).
2. Don’t waste your energy or your life-force trying to perfect things that
don’t work out just the way you would have liked; work with the result you get.
3. Commit yourself fully to taking powerful action in the world in pursuit of
your goals and don’t become overly attached to specific short-term outcomes. If
something doesn’t work out, learn from it and try something else (See
Ultimate Confidence: The Power to Achieve Any Result You
Want).
What would be the difference for you if you were to apply these rules the next
time you find yourself in a situation of adversity? We believe you would find
yourself stronger and better able to work through the problems to the result you
need.
Try it! Let us know how you get on and how we can help.
Best wishes
Kate and Brinley
brinley.platts@btinternet.com
Building Confidence for Dummies by Kate Burton
and Brinley Platts
Neuro-Linguistic Programming for Dummies by
Romilla Ready and Kate Burton
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